I REALLY LOVE EVERYTHING ABOUT THIS
once one of my best friends told me that i was wearing too much makeup (i was wearing lip gloss and mascara) and told me that i should have a look that’s more like my other friend (who wears a full face of makeup every day) as she looks more natural and that moment made me realize that men truly do not understand what makeup looks like
also if a man ever tries to tell you what you should look like again cut his ass off and send it to the moon
How to use sand to freak people out
Imagine if some guy was tripping and saw the woman, runs up to help her and she just crumbles apart in his hands. That’s gonna take the trip south.
“‘Pirates of the Caribbean 5’ sets course for 2017 release”
My sister gave my dad a birthday card and she wrote “you’ve always been like a father to me”
monkeys are better parents than white people
"Get yo lil ass back here and siddown somewhere"
Momma ain’t even have to move or look side ways good to snatch that baby up.
ok damn what kind of camera quality do you have because
"Puns are safe jokes. No one gets hurt by puns."
-tells a pun to a loved one and gets hit because it was terrible-
"I WAS WRONG. I WAS SO HORRIBLY WRONG!"
I guess you could say you were punished.
I don’t know how this could happun.
I will punch you all.
The Prince of Egypt songs (in order of appearance).
once i take my bra off, don’t ask me to do shit for u bitch bc once that bra comes off, i am clocked out of life. i am done. i am finished. i am logged the fuck out.